Blog Archive

Wednesday 28 February 2007

Lizard Serial Killer

Sorry for leaving the last blog entry there for so long!

Recently I keep having lizard traumas, and I must say that today's is the most horrific of all lor.

I am rejoining Stomp, so I had to do a photoshoot right... then there was a miscommunication and nobody told me I am supposed to wear my own clothes!!

So there I was, stupidly, at 10.30am in the morning at SPH, having took a $14.50 cab fare from home, and dressed in my lousy tee and shorts, totally inappropriate for the red and black theme.

5 minutes into meeting the lady-in-charge I stopped short and realised we were in a dire situation.

I cabbed home again to get suitable clothes, and I thought, I might as well just ask the cabbie to wait downstairs - might actually be cheaper than calling another cab.

And so I did!

So I went upstairs, opened my wardrobe, and a fucking gigantic lizard was inside my wardrobe and tried to escape out!!

The stupid fucker tried to weasel through the hinge crack and couldn't, so I took the opportunity and SLAMMED THE DOOR SHUT DAMN HARD.

BAM!

Fucking lizard was smashed until he gong gong between the door and wardrobe!

He was stuck there, so I slammed once more to make sure he is dead.

BAM!

Fucking tail fell out!!

THE TAIL FELL ON MY FAVOURITE WHITE TERRY CLOTH SHORTS!

The tail wiggled so vigariously, as if it had a life of its own, and was so rapidly flopping around that I could only do one thing:





I stood there, stone-still, and screamed my lungs out for Momo.



She hurried in and I explained what happened to her in a trembling voice. She shoved me out of the place (stomp dress in hand) and told me to go before the cab leaves me.

My brave Momo!

She took a giant piece of masking tape and cleared up the corpse.

In the process, she claimed that the lizard's body (still stuck up there in between the door and wardrobe) fell down and when she saw the dead eyes staring up at her, she vomitted.

Poor Momo!

I recently keep having horrific encounters with lizards which involve me somehow giving them a horrible death.

I used to not mind them very much, coz I think unlike cockroaches lizards always know how to siam when they see humans and also they eat the mosquitoes, but man...

Maybe 2 months ago one lizard DIED while being trapped in the tangle of computer cables behind my desk, and THE SMELL IS SOOOOOOOOOOOO BAD.

For a week I could smell a sour, salty and tangy smell in my room, and I didn't know what the hell it was!

I searched for damn long and thought maybe I dropped some food behind the computer table and that's why it smells so bad.

Then finally I couldn't take it anymore and moved the table away.

There, trapped in the complicated cables was a lizard, who, maliciously enough, decided to end its life in my room.

WHERE IS THE FUCK ARE ALL THE CORPSES OF LIZARDS ANYWAY?

Have you ever thought about that? There are so many lizards around, yet I've only seen one dead one (and this one's not dying of old age either, it was trapped). Come think of it I saw another baby one before behind my couch. It was totally dried and black. YUCK!

But where are all the dead old adult lizards? Eaten up? By ants? Yuck, lizard so yucky also got people eat.

Weird. Come think of it, where are all the dead birds and dead stray cats? Are our cleaning bangalas that efficient?!

Food for thought.

Anyway as I was saying! I had to clean up that lizard corpse (just my luck it is resting in hot wires and therefore was prone to emitting that horrible smell 10x) and I kept making puking noises while doing it.

AFTER THAT I DECIDED TO DECLARE WAR ON LIZARDS.
I had enough of their shit (literally), and NO MORE LIZARDS ALLOWED AT HOME!

Just 1 week ago I smacked (with my slipper) one baby lizard to death while showering.

At first it was on the high corner of the bathroom, so I made sure I stood far enough, and sprayed it with damn hot water.

It fell to the ground, at the bottom corner... I turned on the water full blast, and kept spraying it till it was spinning around rapidly in an a miniature wave-pool.

After 10 minutes of malicious spraying, the lizard flopped on its back, apparently dead.

NOT!!!

Bugger was fucking pretending ok!

So I sprayed it again, for another 5 mins. It just won't drown! So annoying! But it was indeed very exhausted from spinning, so it just stood there unmoving.

Big mistake.

I smacked it 3 times with my slipper.

Since I was doing all this drama, I wasn't done with my showering, so I had to continue showering all while pretending the grey corpse of a smashed lizard wasn't just 30 cm away from me.

Yuck!

OK here's the thing. If you are in the same situation as me, and supposing you can't flush the lizard into the drainage coz there is a sieve there, what would you do?

Would you

a) Use plastic bag to pick up the lizard
b) Use your bare hands to pick it up ("Lizard only what, cheh...")
c) Use vaccuum cleaner
d) Use masking tape

I considered A and D, but I didn't wanna feel the mushiness behind the plastic bag and I thought the masking tape might not stick a wet lizard, so I came up with something better.




I used disposable wooden chopsticks to pick it up and throw it into the toilet bowl!

BEST.

The tail took some skill to pick up.

Two days before this, I used a microwave-safe plastic box to trap a gigantic lizard!

When I slid the lid back from under the box and had the lizard trapped, I looked at it, and its stupid bulging eyes seemed to be pleading me to just let it go.


....





DO YOU REMEMBER YOUR FRIEND WHO DIED IN MY COMPUTER CABLES, YOU FUCKER?!

YOU THINK I'M GONNA LET YOU GO?!

NEXT TIME MAYBE WHEN YOUR SORT DIES YOU WILL THINK OF A BETTER PLACE TO DIE, HUH?! HUH?!



And so, hatred pulsed through me at a scary rate and I shook the box containing the lizard hard... for 5 whole mins.

I imagine I must have looked damn crazy and definitely would not have sex with myself if I weren't me. I'd have sex with myself when I am not crazy though. I'm pretty hot.

After shaking it for so long, the tail fell out into 3 separate pieces, and bits of its body was mashed up, not to mention it also shitted itself. Gross!

Before it died, for a split second I contemplated putting the box into the microwave just so it will die in the most horrible way possible. But of course I didn't, the microwave is for food mah!

So anyway, WHY AM I SO CRUEL?!

After all my killings I realised I don't kill for justice anymore, I kill for a sadistic, perverted high!

It makes me feel good and powerful!!

I think I am going to turn into a serial killer! I read on wikipedia that most serial killers start out by torturing small animals even when they are kids.

I told my worry to Rozz, who told me that lizards are not (relatively speaking) animals and they are evil and deserve being tortured.

I then told my worry to Mike, who laughed it off and said that he used to explode ants and also, once, used a BB gun on a chicken.

Those air guns are really painful and he and his brother shot the chicken (who very unfortunately flew into their backyard by mistake) at least 150 times.

Horrible boys!!!

The chicken actually survived and flew away, and Mike said he saw it walking along the sidewalk a few days later.

He also told me he was aiming mostly for the head.

I guess I am not cruel enough to be a serial killer after all.

But hey, if lizards could talk, I'd be their feared serial killer.

Yeah, I'm a Lizard serial killer. I killed 3 in a week. You are a lizard reading this, you better be careful.

************

Anyone watched the movie Hostel? Fantastic show. It's about this guy who went holidaying and was trapped to be the victim at a torture-house where rich clients pay to torture and kill people.

He escaped (after being tortured quite badly), and in turn he tortured his torturer the same way the torturer did to him.

It is very funny, because at the start when he was being "innocently" tortured, I suppose the movie watchers will all agree to take the guy's side and feel strongly against the rich sadistic torturer.

However, when this guy was taking his revenge and did stuff like cutting off his enemy's toe (his own toe got cut off too), I felt like he was doing the right thing, and was even cheering him on to do more to his enemy.

Now that's weird isn't it? It's the same torture, but as long as we feel we can justify it, we seem to enjoy it, but if we can't, then we say it's cruel and heartless blah blah.

Serial killers are just like any of us - it's just that they justify taking their victims because they are sick in the head.

For example, Ted Bundy killed young girls who look like the one who dumped him in high school. John Wayne Gacy killed young boys coz he was secretly homosexual and hated what he called "gay-acting people".

I find American serial killers very fascinating (not in a good way, but still, fascinating)! They are the worst sort, for some reason.

Special Guest Opinion: Dirty South Joe on Why John Brown Was Maliciously Robbed

Fuck yall hateurs. John Brown is the man...
1. Named after one of the most complex and fascinating white people in US history.
2. Has obviously studied the music game well enough to survive as an entity for as long as he pleases.
3. Wrote a song (Car Wars) for the final challenge/performance that was essentially his version of Kanye's "Diamonds From Sierra Leone." Admit it, that shit was deep, thoughtful, and for the format with which he was to present himself, brave.
4. Added "Hallelujah Holla Back" and "Entity, not a rapper" to my everyday vocab before I heard him spit a single rap.
5. He held his own in the battle in Detroit and even got a unanimous vote of confidence from the OG battle rappers in the competition.
6. Mattsoreal & I said so...

Shamrock, however, is a caricature of a caucasian, downsouf rapper. His voice is shrill and high pitched, and his verses and punchlines are outlines of slogans ("Get up get out and DO something") made famous by everybody else. He does the doubletime thang sort of decent, but he's not interesting or talented enough to imagine hearing an entire lp by. Shit, I don't think he could carry a single. I'm not joking when I say that I'd like to hear a John Brown album. With the right production, that shit would be worthwhile. True, he's got a lazy flow and not a lot of energy, but he might actually have something to say.

Obviously, EgoTrip/VH1 made sure they didn't pick the best contestants possible, cause there are quite a few caucasoid heavy spitters runnin around. Regardless, John Brown should have been an easy decision. King of tha burbz was ROBBED!

Tuesday 27 February 2007

MRT Suicide Video

http://alphas.blogs.friendster.com/alphas/2007/02/mrt_suicide_inc.html

Stock market crash

STI -180
no mood for posting

Is GMAIL Racist????

OK So I know that Gmail scans emails and puts "appropriate" ads up to correspond with the emails. For example when I email Paul Wall I get a Grills By Paul Wall ad or some shit. When I write to Cham I get CHAMILLIONAIRE RINGTONES.

But today I had a couple emails go back and forth with UGK's agent and this ad was next to it:

"Nigga
Great deals on Nigga
Shop on eBay and Save!
www.eBay.com"

No one dropped an N-BOMB anywhere in that email, but for some reason this really stupid ad came up. ?!?!?!? Seriously, Gmail need to check themselves.

Is that a joke? I actually found it to be quite offensive. Great deals on Nigga? I'm afraid to click the link but fuck it lemme do this...

It went to ebay and gave me this:

Nigga Deep - Brotha Lynch Hung & Sicx (CD 1998)
Feedback: 4 | 100% Location: Rhode Island

Prince New Power Generation Gold Nigga CD NPG OOP M S
Feedback: 8773 | 99.6% Location: Maryland

DAZ DILLINGER / DAT NIGGA DAZ records LOT 5x12"
Feedback: 4348 | 98.4% Location: New York

RUFF RYDERS - JAY-Z - JIGGA MY NIGGA
Feedback: 2671 | 99.3% Location: Michigan

Plus like 59 more cd's to buy.

Does GMAIL secretly search ads for "Nigga" when Bun B and/or UGK is mentioned in an email? Cuz that's all it could be.

While You Were Watching the White Rapper Show

We were getting down down here on that real shit.

It was truly a magnificent evening of magnanimous proportions! Big Daddy Kane live on stage, backed by Connie Price and the Keystones, Devin the Dude surprise opening set with Jugg Mugg and Rob Quest harmonizing and DJ Domo on the wheels, Scion frestyle winner Reach and a gang of REAL ARTISTS in the house.

All of Houston's best rappers were in attendance. I'ma attempt to run it down and will surely forget some people (message me if I do and I'll edit). For real, none of the young bucks who rap over their vocals and glue pretty stones to their teeth were there, none o fthe people who really need an education in what a real show is all about were there, but there were legends in the house.

Bun B., Willie D and his protege from Huntzville, KB da Kidnappa, K-Rino, Scarface, Zin, Damien & Russel from K-Otix, Southern Intellect, No Saprise, E-Rock of the 5th Ward Boyz, like 30% of the Coughee Brothaz, Rob Quest, Jugg Mugg, DJ Styles, Cipher, Rad Rich, Sincere, Street Pharmacy, Street Fame, NoSaprise, Elliot Ness, DJ Chill, DJ Ovadose, Madd Hatta, Thurogood Wordsmith, Mookie Jones, I mean seriously everytime I turned around I was like "Holy shit HE/SHE's here?"

They came out to represent for a legend. To see the man in the flesh and let him know that they haven't forgotten what he and his music meant to them. It reminds me of a post I did almost two years ago when the Geto Boys had their release party for the Foundation and not one of the "prominent" rappers from H-Town came out to support. I hate to sound like an old whiner, but these young bucks need to go back to school. Big Daddy Kane could have taught them a lesson for real. Shit was magic.

Anyway on to the photos (PS I still didn't buy a new flash so they are all fucked up. That being said I personally like them that way, you probably don't sorry. But this is more in tune to how I actually see things anyway.)


B-Boys in the hizzy.


Gettin' dizzy.


B-Nard of Street Pharmacy!


Bun B and KB of Street Military


DJ CIPHER!


E-Rock of the 5th Ward Boyz and Me (FREE LO-LIFE!)


Willie D and one of his proteges from Huntzville, Shit I need to look up his name again.


Odd Squad in fool effect!


Stacey and her cousin.


Reach opened the show. He won some kind of Scion battle and wasn't bad man. He had a nice set.


Kiara of Street Fame and BP of Street Pharmacy.


DJ Ovadose and KB!


Domo, Devin, KB!


The Squad that's Odd...


Jugg Mugg, Rob Quest, DJ Styles


Jugg Mugg, Rob Quest.


Domo and Jugg Mugg before Devin's surprise set!


Connie Price.


When Jugg Mugg went on stage and announced the surprise set the place went apeshit.


Knowmsayin?






DOMO is not a computer DJ.






Devin and Krisna back stage!


Elliot Ness, Krisna and friend.


ITS THE TAKEOVER!


Rad Rich is a pioneer of many things in this city.


Rad Rich and Cipher - y'all may not know that from 1991-1994 I did a radio show with these dudes every Sunday night on KPFT. How you love that? Respect these pioneers.


Then the ultimate show of all shows. I was not ready to fight the crowd so my photos are not the greatest, but believe me when I say it, Big Daddy Kane showed everyone what a real show is supposed to be. I think maybe the soul of James Brown dropped into his body or some shit cuz that man can ROCK!


I'm talkin' bout dude should be given a PHD in rappin' and should spend his days teaching a class on how to do a real show and everyone who ever wants to rap should be required to takeit. Four semesters at least.

Cuz he ain't half steppin'.

And on the subject of the White Rapper Show, it is my opinion that John Brown got robbed, but I am also happy for Shamrock cuz he seemed like the dude who really actually needed the $100,000. I don't thik that Shamrock had shit for lyrics, his voice cracked, he fucked up a lot and only won because people who don't give a fuck about art think that the south is hot right now.

That being said, they had a distiguished crew of judges, I can't front on Dante Ross, Prince Paul, Serch or Clinton Sparks, they been through it, but when Dante Ross said something like "Well lyrics don't really matter anymore." I had to shed a light tear because alas and alak all you are really saying with that statement is all hope is lost for real music, just go become a commodity and sell your shit and fucking forget about it cuz these kids have no depth and nothings gonna ever change.

And if that's the case then John Brown should have won because he is not a rapper, he is an entity, and that my friend is what is gonna sell in the long run in this new world of rap.

That being said, I saw kids just like all those kids on the White Rapper Show back in 1991. I remember one night at the Hip Hop Coffee shop in like 1992 when a white kid said to me "Damn I'm the only ghetto kid here." And I looked around at the crowd and thought to myself "Pretty much everyone here is from the ghetto you fruitcake who do you think you are?" And the fact is, he wasn't thinking, he was dreaming of an image that he felt as though he had to live up to, which is what every contestant on the White Rapper Show did as well. Everyone of them were image over substance.

O.K. Persia seemed real, but it is obvious that she is only rapping to prove some weird point. Not one of those kids had it in them. Like to me, you can say what you want about Eminem, I find the dude unlistenable at this point, but fact is that dude is a rapper. He's an artist. He has to rap, that's what he does. Hip hop is definitely inside that kid no matter how you feel about him. The motherfuckers on that show just wanted to be on TV and I have to admit that I had a great time watching them get symbolically dragged in the river that is the music business. The dirty, polluted, non-life supporting, murky, stank, stagnant river that is the music industry.

Thank you Ego Trip, Serch, Prince Paul and everyone else for entertaining me. And thank you Misfit for sending me a Valentines Day greeting on my MySpace. You're so nice!

HA!

Anyway, from what I hear the Rapid Ric/Witnes/Mike Frost/Roxy event in NYC was tight. J-Zone tells me the White Rapper Show Wrap Up Party was cool but John Brown got booed and Persia rapped over her vocals.

Oh yeah, one more thing, Big Daddy Kane, Devin and Reach did NOT rap over their vocals. Get familiar indeed young rapper knaves. Tides finna turn back. Watch.

(P.S. I listened to Celtic Frost's To Megatherion and Into the Pandemonium whilst resizing these photos and writing this. They don't rap over their vocals either. At least they didn't.)

Monday 26 February 2007

Like this also can?

Sorry for being away for long.....

Saw a comments leave on my blog.

Saying that a gal was cheated by a friend, ask her go to hotel, so that can pay her money. But when she reaches there, 3 men where there...

And two do to her.. while one recording...

What kind of world is this???

Sunday 25 February 2007

IT'S OFFICIAL! SXSW Hip Hop '07 as Curated by HoustonSoReal with the real credit going to Craig Stewart and South By Southwest for Keeping it Trill

Whew.

I'm so freakin' excited.

So freakin' excited!

Just over two weeks out and then it's goin' down! This is MY time of year man. The time that gets me the most excited. Fuck January 1st, my year starts with South By Southwest. My fiscal year anyway. SXSW kick starts so much shit for me and this hip hop community, shit the music community in general and man I am so glad to be a part of it. I'm not gonna ramble on, I'm just gonna present you the schedule. The realness. What I been talm 'bout for so long.

Thanks to all who are down, and apologies to all who didn't make it this year. I got as much as I could poppin' on this mug right here and think I/we did a pretty good job. I know I personally want to see everyone on this list. But that ain't gonna happen (Cuz I'ma be in that LEE SCRATCH PERRY SHOW FOOLS!) Anyway chicka check it check it ouuuuuuut....

All of the following events are in Austin, Texas from March 13 - 18. Get ready ready.

SEE THE ENTIRE LIST OF OVER 1,400 ACTS RANGING FROM HIP HOP TO ROCK TO COUNTRY TO PUNK TO JAZZ TO WORLD TO EXPERIMENTAL TO HOUSEY BAILLE BOUNCY CRUNKNESS HERE.

(PS I'll have links for all artists in next day or so. For now I'm just adding links for ones I know off the top of my head).

Tuesday March 13th

George Washington Carver Museum & Cultural Center – 1165 Angelina – All Ages
Doors at 5 p.m.
5:30 – 6:15 p.m. – Matt Sonzala of HoustonSoReal Interviews Chamillionaire
6:30 – 7:00 p.m. – Chamillionaire Performs (Houston, TX)
7:20 – 7:50 p.m. – Gutta Gang (Austin, TX)
8:10 – 9:00 p.m. – Cyril Neville & Tribe 13 (New Orleans, LA / Austin, TX)

Wednesday March 14th

Visions - 614 East 6th Street – 18+
1:00 – 2:00 a.m. – Devin the Dude (Houston, TX)
12:30 – 1:00 a.m. – Coughee Brothaz/14K/ Rob Quest of the Odd Squad (Houston, TX)
11:45 – 12:25 a.m. – Evidence of Dilated Peoples (Los Angeles, CA)
11:00 – 11:30 p.m. – Kidz In Da Hall (Chicago, IL)
10:30 – 10:55 – K-Rino & The South Park Coalition (Houston, TX)
10:05 – 10:20 – KJ Hines (Austin, TX)
9:45 – 10:00 – Public Offenders (Austin, TX)
9:15 – 9:30 – Lower Life Form (Houston, TX)
8:45 – 9:00 – Southern Intellect (Houston, TX)
8:00 – 8:45 –DJs Domo & Good Grief of the Coughee Brothaz (Houston, TX)
Hosted by Matt Sonzala of HoustonSoReal

Thursday March 15th

Club One15 – 115 San Jacinto St. – 21+
1:15 – 2:00 a.m. – Billy Cook (Houston, TX)
12:30 – 1:00 a.m. – D-Madness (Austin, TX)
11:45 – 12:15 p.m. – Keite Young (Ft. Worth, TX)
11:00 – 11:30 p.m. – Ter’ell Shahid (Austin, TX)
10:00 – 10:45 p.m.- Carmen Rodgers & Geno Young (Dallas, TX)
9:15 – 9:45 p.m. - W. Ellington Felton (Washington, DC)
8:30 – 9:00 p.m. – Nuwamba (Ft. Worth, TX)
Hosted by Mr. Blakes, DJ For Night Frances Jay of Neo Soul Cafe

Zero Degrees – 405 East 7th Street – 18+
12:00 – 12:45 a.m. Chingo Bling featuring Stunta, Lucky Luciano, Coast & Jezufavio
11:25 – 11:45 p.m. - Play-N-Skillz (Irving, TX)
11:05 – 11:25 p.m. – Reyez (Irving, TX)
10:50 – 11:05 p.m. – Lumba (Dallas, TX)
10:15 – 10:45 p.m.- Rob G. (Houston, TX)
9:45 – 10:00 p.m. - J. Kapone (Austin, TX)
9:15 – 9:30 p.m. – D of Carnival Beats (Austin, TX)
8:30 – 9:00 p.m. - Juan Gotti (Houston, TX)
Hosted by Paul Saucido of ME Television

Copa – 217 Congress Ave. – 21+
1:00 – 2:00 a.m. – C-Mon & Kypski (Amsterdam, Netherlands)
12:15 – 12:45 a.m. - Cadence Weapon (Edmonton, AB, Canada)
11:30 – 12:00 a.m. - Chris Lee (Oslo, Norway)
11:00 – 11:25 p.m. - El Axel (Oslo, Norway)
10:00 – 10:45 p.m. – Grand Analog (Winnipeg, MB, Canada)
9:15 – 9:45 p.m. Monster Maker (Washington, DC)
8:30 – 9:00 p.m. C-Rayz Walz (Bronx, NY)
8:00 p.m. DJ Spinner T and DJ Crop Diggie of the Superstardjs (Austin TX)

Fox & Hound – 401 Guadalupe St. – 18+
1:00 – 2:00 a.m. – UGK (Port Arthur, TX)
12:15 – 1:00 a.m. – UGK Records Featuring
11:30 – 12:00 a.m. – Boss Hogg Outlawz (Houston, TX)
10:45 – 11:15 p.m. – Willie D Introducing Huntzville (Houston, TX)
9:45 – 10:05 p.m. – KB da Kidnappa of Street Military (Houston, TX)
9:15 – 9:35 p.m. – Steve Austin (Dallas, TX)
8:45 – 9:00 p.m. – Saint (Houston, TX)
8:20 – 8:40 p.m. - Short, Bird Street, Mike Moe & DJ Wrecka of Beltway 8 (Houston, TX)
DJs for the Night DJ Grip, DJ Since & Young Spinna

Friday March 16th

Town Lake Stage at Auditorium Shores – All Ages
8:00 p.m. - Public Enemy (New York, NY)
6:45 p.m. - Ozomatli (Los Angeles, CA)
6:00 p.m. – X-Clan

Beauty Bar Patio – 617 E. 7th St. – 21+
1:15 – 2:00 a.m. - The Federation (Oakland, CA)
12:30 – 1:00 a.m. – Balance (Oakland, CA)
12:00 – 12:25 a.m. – The Pack (San Francisco, CA)
11:30 – 11:55 p.m. – Saafir (Oakland, CA)
11:00 – 11:25 p.m. – Rico Pabon (Los Angeles, CA)
10:30 – 10:50 p.m. – Qualo (Chicago, IL)
10:00 – 10:20 p.m. – Roxy Cottontail (New York, NY)
9:30 – 9:50 p.m. – Wale (Washngton, DC)
9:00 – 9:30 p.m. – Doujah Raze (Brooklyn, NY)
8:00 – 9:00 p.m. - DJ For Night – Catchdubs (New York, NY)

Visions - 614 East 6th Street – 18+
12:00 – 2:00 a.m. – MTV & Mountain Dew Presents ????????????
-------------------------------------------------------------------
11:30 – 12:00 a.m. - Rapid Ric’s Whut it Dew Family - - Gerald G., Black Mike, Bavu Blakes, Magno, Chalie Boy, Da Ryno (Austin/Houston, TX)
10:55 – 11:25 p.m. – Houston North Side All Stars - Big Tike, Big Pic, Lil Mario, Magno, Lester Roy, Blindcyde and more!(Houston, TX)
10:25 – 10:50 p.m. – Money Waters (Dallas, TX)
10:00 – 10:20 p.m. – VIP, (Austin, TX)
9:35 – 9:55 p.m. – MC Fatal, (Austin, TX)
9:00 – 9:30 p.m. – DJ Chill Presents Chill Factor Music (Houston, TX)
8:00 – 9:00 p.m. - Host and DJ for night - OG Ron C

Saturday March 17th

Club One15 - – 115 San Jacinto St. – 21+
1:00 – 2:00 a.m. – Dirty Wormz (Austin, TX)
12:00 – 12:40 a.m. – Nayrok (Dallas, TX)
11:00 – 11:40 p.m. – Peekaboo Theory (Houston, TX)
10:15 – 10:45 p.m. – Purple Crush (New York, NY)
9:45 – 10:10 p.m. – Deaf in the Family (New York, NY)
9:00 – 9:30 p.m. – Studemont Project (Houston, TX)
8:00 – 8:40 p.m. – Dujeous (New York, NY)

Zero Degrees – 405 East 7th Street – 18+
TheScrewShop.com 10 Year Anniversary
1:20 a.m. – 2:00 a.m. – Trae (Houston, TX)
12:50 a.m. – 1:10 a.m. - Carnival Beats (Austin, TX)
12:35 a.m. – 12:50 a.m. – Basswood Lane (Austin, TX)
12:15 a.m. – 12:30 a.m. – Grit Boys (Houston, TX)
11:55 p.m. – 12:10 a.m. – Sparkdawg (Killeen, TX)
11:35 p.m. – 11:50 p.m. – Dok Holiday & Set 4 Life (Austin, TX)
11:15 p.m. – 11:30 p.m. – South Bound (Austin, TX)
10:55 p.m. – 11:10 p.m. – Ryno (Austin, TX)
10:35 p.m. – 10:50 p.m. – Big Sid (San Angelo, TX)
10:15 p.m. – 10:30 p.m. – Circle G’z (Houston, TX)
Hosted by Tosin of thescrewshop.com
10:00 p.m. DJ Bounz – And DJ for the night

Visions - - 614 East 6th Street – 18+
Dallas Night Presented by Ozone Magazine & Urban South
1:15 – 2:00 a.m. - Big Tuck, Tum Tum & DSR (Dallas, TX)
1:00 – 1:10 a.m. - T. Balla (Dallas, TX)
12:45 – 12:55 a.m. - M. Dot (Dallas, TX)
12:20 – 12:40 a.m. - Big Chief (Dallas, TX)
12:00 – 12:15 a.m. - Gator Mayne (Dallas, TX) – 214-635-7840
11:30 – 11:50 p.m. – Kottonmouth (Dallas, TX)
11:00 – 11:20 p.m. - Mr. Pookie & Mr. Lucci (Dallas, TX)
10:40 – 10:55 p.m. – Lil Peace (Dallas, TX)
10:15 – 10:35 p.m. - Big Ben (Dallas, TX)
9:30 – 10:00 p.m. - PPT (Dallas, TX)
8:45 – 9:15 p.m. – Verbal Seed (Dallas, TX)
8:00 – 8:30 p.m. – Thesis (Dallas, TX)
DJ for Night – DJ Drop (Dallas, TX)

I mean, if you like rap music, I mean, if you like real rap music, you can't really front on none of this shit. It is goin' down this year!

I'll be updating y'all on the regular of course over these next coupla weeks. But shit man, inhale all this shit and start making plans. A lot of these shows are gonna be huge. We will sell tickets at the door to all shows. SXSW Registrants with Badges and/or wristbands will get in as well.

THERE IS NO GUEST LIST FOR ANY SXSW SHOW AT ALL SO DO NOT ASK! Either register or be a part of it.

Now do you understand why I don't answer my phone? I'm freaking out over here. ENJOY!

Saturday 24 February 2007

Monday Night Events! Houston and New York City!

If you haven't RSVP'd to the Big Daddy Kane show on Monday night at Warehouse Live here in Houston DO IT NOW! Go to www.scion.com/livemetro DO IT NOW!





And if yer in New York Monday night go check out DJ's Rapid Ric and Witnes at SWAY for Mike Frost's birthday party! Get you a SLF EMP T-Shirt and get yoself lookin' right!


I'ma be in Houston Monday gettin' paid by my peoples from New York (and Japan).
Or loosely translated as "Ridding the public of vermin"

Some of you might remember I used to have a blog dedicated, at first at least, solely to produce hate messages against me - very uncreatively and childishly named "Xialanxue".

(Don't try to go to his site, it now contains a spam address with irritating pop-ups)

Throughout a span of a year, the blog owner (who is an anonymous coward of course) wrote many lies about me and caused me countless tears, striking especially hard to siphon fame whenever I was down or had some controversy going on.

I did not know him (nobody who knows me will presume the absurd things he says about me), and yet he sounded like he knows the inside of my head so well, assuming my motives, my intentions, and boardcasting them to the naive internet world, who dumbly enough chose to believe him.

Most annoying of all, he stood on high moral ground and preached to others how to live their lives, when he is just a nobody. He could be your regular admin clerk, or your middle-aged illiterate uncle, or even some computer geek who never left his pc world.

Is he Gandhi? Is he my father? I presume not. So he is in no position to tell me what to do.

The last straw came when he published an article saying that a real life friend of mine told him that I was... something like none of my real life friends even like me.

*ROLL EYES*

IS THAT IRRITATING OR WHAT!?

As if any of my real-life friends will make friends with vermin like him! Seriously, he needs to wake up and smell the real shit: WE ARE OF A DIFFERENT CLASS. My friends will never make friends with someone like YOU!

All my good friends range from knowing me 10-3 years, and you would think that people who dislike me will not stick around for so long.

Countless times, I had my looks insulted, my photos defaced, and my reputation defamed, all to just earn him a few adsense dollars.

The retard even concluded he is good enough to be impersonated! Isn't that funny? If a can of abalone claims to be some barnacles one day, that is called SPOOFING.

NOT impersonation, simply because you are not good enough, geddit? YOU ARE JUST THE ACCESSORY, WITHOUT WHICH THE POTAGONIST YOU WON'T EVEN EXIST.

FUCK HIM.

I hated him so much, one day I decided I had enough, and approached lawyers.

My friend introduced me to a lawyer who agreed on taking on the case.

Somehow, XLX must have caught wind of the impending case, because he stopped writing about me.

Instead, he terrorized other bloggers, including Dawn (first posting her pre-op photos then saying how she is sweet etc unlike me *roll eyes*), Wee Shu Min (whoever she is), Tammy and various other random people.

FUCK HIM.

Starhub took a long time to get back with the identity behind the ip address, and I thought, since XLX stopped blogging about me, I shall let it go.


Just two days ago, he resurfaced again, linking to some useless forum person who dug out my mistake of a Maxim photoshoot 2 years ago, and claiming I posed for it with my new plastic nose.

How grossly wrong can his information get?

(Also, seriously, the nose job insults are just sooooo lame, it's like throwing styrofoam daggers at me).

And once again, he has the guts to insinuate disgust at my looks.

Let's face it, he is probably an ugly loser and will jump at the chance to have sex with someone half my celibre.

Digressing, why are some ugly people so unabashed? HOW can you keep going on about how some other people are ugly when it only draws attention to how you look like a buttplug?

So anyway, I wrote an email to him:

Hey there,

I don't know what tricks you are up to again, but I think I should inform you that I am one step away from suing you. My lawyers actually have gathered everything needed, and I've already paid starhub $500 to get your ip address to reveal who you are.

My lawyers have all your archives saved, and as you know, it is unarguable that you have defamed me countless of times (especially with regards to you putting up the pictures of me from edmw forum some time ago). It doesn't matter that you took down your entries: Point is that they were all once there.

And I don't even know you personally - I don't deserve all the trauma you have caused me.

I did not go ahead with the law suit because you stopped blogging about me for some time, and I decided to live and let live.

All I need is $2,000 to go ahead with it (for court charges).

Should I go ahead with it? You decide. Either shut down your blog completely, or get sued.

The damages won't be little, and I'm sure I'll have the support of many other girls whom you have made it your business to defame.


Yours sincerely,
Wendy


And thus he shut down his site.

Good riddence, Mr Nobody. You would have been a nobody without me, so let's have you return to that insignificant position. I'm sure the rest of the girls and I will miss your sorry ass.(*insert Borat "NOT!")

I guess that the question I'd have to ask God when I die (presuming we get to ask a question, which I think is only fair) is who he is. I'd then seduce the weather guy and make him throw a lightning bolt at xlx's face, splintering it into a million burnt pieces. Ahhh... that feels good. What do you mean what about his mother? Too bad la, as if my mother wasn't sad when he kept defaming me!

I wonder if after I die I will be able to keep my new nose, or go back to the old one? It will be so sad to suddenly have a big nose again.

(What do you mean how do I know he is a guy? I just know! Girls don't blog like that.)

Friday 23 February 2007

Twisted Black Gets 30 Years in PrisonChingo Bling, Rapid Ric's Whut it Dew Family, KJ Hines in AustinUGK Confirmed for SXSW

Man Twisted Black Got Thirty Years for Conspiracy to Distribute Cocaine.

What that gone do? Nothin'.

Yes, UGK hath confirmed for SXSW. They will perform Thursday Night March 15th at Fox & Hound, Austin, Texas, 1 a.m. Opening acts are in the works now but have already been decided just waiting on confirmation. Official announcement tomorrow, but KB da Kidnappa is on the show for sure. MDDL FNGZ? Vicious? Hezeleo? Bobo Luchiano? UGK RECORDS???? Who else? Man we gonna hull y'all out with this one.

Speaking of hulling out, well we won't speak on that at all, cuz I always try to keep things positive, unless I start crying about some shit and that's not really negative, that's just emotion dog, and emotions are real. Emotion's are in full effect. With so many...

Anyway, yerple it went derple. SoReal. Chingo Bling, Lucky Luchiano, Stunta, Jezufavio, Rapid Ric's Whut it Dew Family of Gerald G., Black Mike & Bavu Blakes (Chalie and Magno and Da Ryno were set to go on after Chingo as a surprise but an unfortunate event cut the night short. THANKS MY DUDE!), KJ Hines and Swift of 4Mula Beats all STRAIGHT WRECKED the Parish this past Wednesday (both literally and figuratively) for a special ME Television taping that might be shown someday if the FCC happens to loosen it's profanity laws in the next couple weeks.

Hip Hop Ya Don't Stop. Here's the photos and a bit of a run down. Big ups to all who came out!


Black Meezy in the Heezy is pretty much about to blow. For real. He and Gerald G and well, about 7 other artists/groups in Austin are about to do some shit if you'll open up yo earholes. Why are Austin and Dallas SMOKING Houston on the talent meter these days? It's crazy man. Quit looking for shiny teeth and dig into some real music cuz that's where it's at.


Smackola of Dirty Wormz


DJ Young Spinna was a last minute addition to the bill and he really added a lot of flavor to the night! Dude is 14 years old, out on a school night KILLIN' IT! I see a huge future for him as well. He's extremely talented and keeps it real man. Not just spinning hits and BS. He's supportive and has a genuine knowledge of this music and his city. RESPECT!


Basswood Lane ready for their next cover!

PS My flash is broken, waiting on some checks to get a new one. Hopefully my BDK Photos will be thowed)


My boy the Expert Witness in the building having me all bleary eyed and dripped out. This my people!


KJ Hines is another young buck on the Austin scene. His Capital City video gets a lot of play on ME Television and he's also quite talented. Lookout for a mixtape from him and Young Spinna real soon.




Then things got blurry. This is Shawn David McMillen. We used to drive around Houston smoking a bong with a skull on it, then we'd go to the dolla movies on the west side and smoke the same bong and stand on the seats and walk all on the seats all fucking wasted and being fools with it and man, I could go on for days. Now he's an avant garde noise rocker maniac in these streets. Look for him on Emperor Jones Records and on a special collaborative effort entitled THE YELLA ALBUM. The Yella Album gonna be revolutionary.


OSCAR! Of Luxury Mindz is way better at this picture taking stuff than I.


Dru Fay of ME Television interviews Gerald G.


Rapid Ric, Dru and Gerald G. If you don't have Ric and Gerald's Mr. 512 Mixtape go get it free right now at MIXTAPEMECHANIC.COM




Black Mike and Gerald G. showed fools the future of rap music.




And just let them know.


Bavu Blakes joined them on stage and brought the house down.




As evidenced here.




See Rapid Ric live with Witnes in NYC at SWAY Monday night for Mike Frost's B-Day Party and the NYV Debut of his SLF-EMP T Shirt line!


Gerald G. is the present and the future!






Jezufavio is off the chain. Somehow I want to book him to perform at a $1000 a plate benefit dinner for Rick Perry or some shit. They need and deserve his wit and wisdom.


I couldn't believe Lucky Luchiano showed up. I been jammin' him for ages and never met him!


Stunta, Chingo's hype man, is really coming up with some dope solo material. Be on the lookout!




The man, the myth, the legend, Chingo Bling. Finna drop his debut album May 8th.


Stunta and Chingo, always a dope show.






Great set. Wish it wasn't cut short. We won't get into that here though. Those who know, know. And those who know, know I am extremely angry.

And those who's who, know he is officialy banned from everything. Forever.


These boys be flowin' tho...

And here's some You Tubage of Gerald G., Black Mike and Bavu Blakes. Enjoy...





Peace to Blueberry and Tony C for those!

DOWNLOAD MR. J. PAT REMIX OF LITTLE GIRL GONE HERE AND LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK.